Mad : Jack : BabymakerBreaking into the world through the bloody flanks of a 14-year-old virgin
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Name: John Wilmot,
Location: New York City, New York, United States
Gender: Male


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Member Since: 4/2/2003

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What Are You, Some Kinda Fuckin Moron??
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-=Fuck Bush=-
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UCLA BRUINS BLOGRING
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jesus was a drug addict
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English Majors Collective
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[AAA] Asians Against Azns
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Prose Before Hos
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--{ Columbia University }--
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Saturday, February 02, 2008

Subway Talk

- Could you move over? I'd like to sit down.

- No, go around.

- (Sitting) That's lovely.

- I'm pregnant.

- And how's that working out for you, you stupid bitch?

Silence. Then, one minute later:

- You could've just moved over.

- Oh my gawwwwwd, shut the fuck up.

- What're you going to do about it?


Sunday, January 27, 2008

Men At Work

One of the problems I've had recently with maintaining this blog is that I now personally know the five people that read it.

Which is really inconvenient.

So I probably shouldn't detail how my current roommate has been explaining to me how she wants to stick her finger up some boy's ass and laugh.

However, she just five minutes ago said to me: "You're so funny! I want to beat you up!"

Yeah. Those two desires don't strike me as being entirely unrelated. I want a public record out there in case anything fucked up happens.


Saturday, January 12, 2008

Female Terminators

Happy New Year!

Okay, down to business. I was pretty disappointed with lameass Terminator 3 and, having seen the promos for The Sarah Connor Chronicles (there was a particularly annoying one spliced into Fox's Pregame Show), I realize that whoever is in charge with this franchise needs to do a much better job casting the female Terminators.

Let's take a look at what's going on here:

skull
TERMINATOR


patrick
TERMINATOR


williams-serena
TERMINATOR


See where this is going? Let's continue.

loken
FUCKBOT


clinton
TERMINATOR


schwar
TERMINATOR


glau
FUCKBOT


arcee
FUCKBOT


inflatable
FUCKBOT


williams-venus
TERMINATOR


Friday, December 28, 2007

Bored at Work

I scribbled a message on a paper towel and pinned it to the stall door in the men's bathroom.  The extent of my productivity...

I don’t know how much longer I can survive here.  I have been sustaining myself, if you can call it that, on the rats I catch and the driblets of urine that seep through the pipes.

But the rats decrease steadily in number and the urine has lost what little nutritional value it ever had.  I fear the office workers in the surrounding cubicles do not eat as healthily as they should and this, alas, affects my comportment.

I fear that my sanity is in ruins, that with every day I crouch here, trapped, a valuable part of my identity flakes away forever.

Already, the face of my beloved fades.  How I miss her.  I wonder what she smells like?  Lilac, I can only assume.  Ringlets of golden hair.

One day, I will be freed from my imprisonment.  Until that day comes…

…I leave this letter, written on a filthy paper towel I retrieved from the adjoining restroom.  If you, whoever you are, find this and not me, know that I have done the unthinkable.  Know that I have given up.

For Humanity

Richard Larkindale



Monday, December 24, 2007

It's Christmas Eve.  Ho ho ho, I'm at the office, ho ho ho. 

I don't know what sort of fucking company I work for.



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